The Robe

Psalm 102   Let this be recorded for a generation to come, so that a people yet to be created may praise the Lord...
                  That He looked down from His holy height, from heaven the Lord looked at the earth, to hear the groans of the prisoners, to set free those who were doomed to die that they may declare in Zion the Name of the Lord and in Jerusalem His praise when people gather together and kingdoms to  worship the Lord...

Of old You laid the foundation of the earth, and the heavens are the work of Your hands.  They will perish but You will remain; they will all wear out like a garment.  You will change them like a robe, and they will pass away, but You are the same, and Your years have no end.


Do you know those dreams you have at night that linger around the edges of your consciousness in the morning?  The feeling that you have forgotten something of great importance?

Yeah, me too.

This coming week wraps up another travel nursing contract in the world of outpatient chemotherapy, this time at City of Hope in Pasadena, and I don't know if it is because of this or just the nature of my work in general but I woke this morning to a dream about the end.  The end of life for me.

You change them like a robe, and they will pass away.

Such amazing courage it takes to face cancer or any other such disease.  I witness those that I care for clawing and scratching for life.  Through chemo, surgery, radiation as well as the daily struggles of normal life they draw on strengths that they never thought would be there.

Even greater resolve is needed to let go; to stop fighting and to just BE until the end.

As for me these thoughts always come with a haunting question....Where does this strength come from?  And what does the answer to this question leave me with?

If you follow this blog then you know to whom I give credit for my own life.  What He has done for me has played out in the pages of this work.  The question is, Where does your strength come from?  And what does the answer to that leave you with?

One thing is certain...

They will perish but You will remain; they will ALL wear out like a garment.  You will change them like a robe, and they will pass away.

As I write this and the dream flutters around the edges of my memory I see myself there in the dream being content....feeling complete and whole, utterly happy as my Father slips a new robe onto my shoulder.  I am no longer becoming....anything.  I just am.

He looked down from His holy height, from heaven the Lord looked at the earth, to hear the groans of the prisoners, to set free those who were doomed to die that they may declare in Zion the Name of the Lord.

Maybe this is what it is like in the end, a groaning to be released from a prison of disease or disability.  Maybe we will finally see the ultimate mystery of death and welcome it like a friend and find there all that was ever required for happiness.