The Devotion

Jeremiah 2 The word of the Lord came to me, saying, Go and proclaim in the hearing of Jerusalem, Thus says the Lord, I remember the devotion of your youth, your love as a bride, how you followed Me in the wilderness in a land not sown. Israel was holy to the Lord, the firstfruits of His harvest. All who ate of it incurred guilt; disaster came upon them, declares the Lord. Hear the word of the Lord, O house of Jacob, and all the clans of the house of Israel. Thus says the Lord: What wrong did your fathers find in Me that they went far from me, and went after worthlessness, and became worthless?

Once again I sit in the courtyard in the heart of Jerusalem seeking His heart, His voice, His words. And He speaks. Where are you, Connie? What are you doing? Are you working for Me or living for Me? Are you in love with Me? Do you love Me as a new bride loves her husband?

I remember the night that Ken and I met. It is was a miracle really that we found each other. Actually, he found me. I was at Nightfall with my sister and Ken saw me sitting on a stone bench. I was waiting on my sister to finish a conversation with someone else. I had no idea that Ken was watching me. As he started to approach me, another man walked up with a flower to give me that he had bought from a street vendor. When Ken saw this, he walked away. The man sat down beside me and said something cheesy like, I know you are not here alone. And I said, You are right, I am not. And he walked away. When Ken came back by I was with my sister, walking to our car. So he followed us. We were almost to our car when I heard a man behind me say, Excuse me ladies but are you going to Blue Water? My first thought before even turning around was, if that is that guy with the broken flower I'm not gonna be happy. I groaned as my sister turned around to answer him. As I turned I saw Ken for the first time and my heart skipped. As I started back to the fence he was talking to my sister but his eyes were on me. I heard him say, Will you meet me at Blue Water? As I started to say no my sister said yes. In that moment, across that fence, Ken held his hand out to me. This complete stranger on the street standing there looking like a vulnerable little boy with his hand out. And I placed my hand in his for the first time. And I know this sounds crazy but I have belonged to him since that moment. My thoughts were for him. My desire was for him. I sought him. And the longer that we are together the more I love him. He is my friend. My protector. He is the soundboard for my thoughts and ideas. He is my love.

When we fall in love with our Lord we have many of the same emotions. We long for Him. Our thoughts are toward Him. We dream of being in His presence and we find rest and contentment in Him. He captures our heart. But hearts are fickle. Tempted to wander. Prone to stray. Drifting away. Why? For many of the same reasons that drifting happens in a physical relationship. Day to day living is much different than the honeymoon. Laundry, cleaning, cooking, work. Responsibility. These are deterrents to romance. And sometimes, without even realizing that it has happened, we replace love and devotion with duty. And duty to God smothers joy. Just like in an earthly marriage.

So I must ask the question. Is it duty or devotion? Responsibility or romance? Do I see His yoke as easy and His burdens as light? Am I in love with Him or just joined to Him? Am I engaged with Him or just involved with Him? And the truth is that sometimes I am a little of both.

So what to do? The same as in my marriage to Ken. When I feel myself becoming a homemaker instead of a bride, I call him away to privacy. I remember the way my heart skipped at the sight of him. I remember the way I felt when I placed my hand in his. I recall all of the wonderful times that we have spent together in different cities, different restaurants, just the two of us. So we get away together, alone. And there we find what we found at the beginning.

It is the same with my Lord. He calls me away to privacy with him. Alone I seek His voice, His face in prayer, in worship, in fellowship. I recall what He is to me. How He raised me up from the dead. How he saved my soul from Hell. How He delivered me from bondage. So we get away together, alone. And there we find what we found at the beginning.

Later in this chapter the Lord says, For my people have committed two evils: they have forsaken Me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.

Father, I love you. I don't want to just serve You. I want to know you. I want my thoughts to be toward You. I want to long for You, alone. Call me away, my beloved. Remind me of who You are and what You have done, for me. I have found no wrong in You. I will not trade knowing You for the worthlessness of anything besides You.