This morning, as with every time I sit to blog, I pray that the Lord would speak to me and that I would write only what I hear from Him; only truth. So sometimes I read for a while in different parts of scripture until He says stop and then the thoughts come.
So as I was reading Psalm 40 I was enjoying it but not really feeling anything to write about until I read right past this portion of the Psalm and He said, Stop.
So I backed up and read it again.
And He speaks....Today this writing is for you Connie.
So I wait for the thoughts to come.
Connie, this is My gift to you. This is what you have done for Me. You have shared your stories of My salvation, My deliverance, My salvation and My faithfulness. I am pleased with you.
And immediately I try to put myself down by saying, Lord surely you can't mean this. I have no great congregation. I probably have about three readers. And I...
And He says, Stop Connie. That is not the point.
Why is it so easy for you to bear My reproof, but not My favor? You would choose the whip over a kiss.
And I am crushed by the truth in this.
So today is to be another day of turning over the soil in my soul. We will continue to do the hard work of looking past the symptoms to get to the real issues.
So we begin to reason, He and I. And this is part of our conversation.
Why is it so easy for you to bear My reproof, but not My favor?
Low self-esteem, maybe?
No. Not entirely.
Feelings of inadequacy or unworthiness?
Yes but that is just a symptom. What is the core?
Sometimes I doubt Your love for me. Sometimes I doubt that You can be trusted.
Yes! You do. And today we will deal with that.
From the very beginning of man, with Adam and Eve, Satan has whispered into our ears the lie that God is not trustworthy.
And how can we ever love someone fully that we cannot fully trust?
Because we are incapable of perfect love and complete trust ourselves, we project our lack onto Holy God. We ascribe to Him human flaws. So when He acts towards us in perfect love and acceptance we counter Him with a flawed sense of who He is and what He is trying to accomplish. Our reactions to Him depend on the situation; on whether He is reproving us, teaching us, refining us, making a request of us or possibly even the hardest of all, complimenting us.
How could Holy God compliment us? Because He LOVES us. Like a father, like a brother, like a mentor, like a lover!!!
Song of Songs You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you....You have captivated My heart, my sister, my bride; you have captivated My heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace. How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride! How much better is your love than wine, and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!
The very foundation of our faith is His love for us.
John 3 For God so loved the world He gave His world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.
My love is not a metaphor, Connie. It is everything. It is My nature; it is who I AM. It is real love. Perfect love. Active love. And I love you.
And in my heart I bow before Him, He places His hand on my head and I am humbled that He not only sees me, He is pleased with me.
Father you are unexpected. You are lovely and altogether beautiful. There is no flaw in You. Thank You for teaching me about perfect love. You are more than I can ever imagine. You give more and more and more of Yourself and grasping just a glimpse of Your glory overwhelms and delights me. She us Lord who You really are and how You really see us. Destroy, O Lord, tear down the lies of what we have been told by the world and by our enemy.
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